Definitely True

04 Sep, 2015 Ernie Vance

Spinning is dangerous and can cause the unraveling of reality.

11 Aug, 2015 Ernie Vance

All children have water-soluble skin.

29 Jul, 2015 Ernie Vance

Bounce houses trap your body and break your spirit.

16 Jul, 2015 Ernie Vance

Sharpen your cheese by increasing disappointment and despair.

29 Jun, 2015 Ernie Vance

The real reason fireworks were invented.

20 May, 2015 Ernie Vance

Control the future hair patterns of your children using permanent marker.

11 May, 2015 Ernie Vance

House slippers are for moving houses.

children